Operatie is voorbij!

Even een snel berichtje over de situatie van de hart operatie van ons kleine meisje, Julia. Gisteren zijn we naar het ziekenhuis gegaan in voorbereiding voor het herstel van de aorta van Julia en we waren gelukkig genoeg dat we beide mochten blijven slapen in het ziekenhuis de afgelopen nacht. Ze deed het geweldig en heeft bijna niet gezeurd over het feit dat ze niet mocht eten gedurende de laatste paar uur voor de operatie zelf, ook al was ze overduidelijk overstuur van de bloed-afname in de vroegere avond. Ze hebben “lijnen gezet” zodat ze haar gemakkelijker aan het infuus kunnen zetten en haar bloed-druk konden opmeten, enz en moesten haar bloed opsturen voor controle van haar bloedgroep. Wij als ouders zouden elke mogelijkheid aangrijpen om ons meisje vast te houden en te knuffelen zodra ze begint te huilen. Dokters en zusters moeten hun werk doen en zijn niet zo snel overtuigd. Julia heeft het daarentegen zeker geprobeerd: Ze huilde alsof er geen morgen was, maar geen gehoor Ik stond buiten de deur en mijn hart brak terwijl ik haar hoorde huilen en ik kon niets voor haar doen. Na ongeveer 15 minuten on ongelovelijk pijnlijk waren, kwam ze naar buiten en ik hield her dicht bij me, terwijl ze nog steeds schokte en snokte van de angst van wat net was gebeurd. Gelukkig is een moeder’s borst het beste medicijn en voelde ze zich stukje bij beetje beter gedurende de avond.

Haar laatste maaltijd was rond 2:00 uur en vlak na 4:00 uur werd ze wakker en nog duidelijk geschokt van wat de hele situatie eerder die avond. Ik probeerde haar gerust te stellen op de normale manieren maar dat werkte niet zo goed als ik had gehoopt, dus besloot ik haar op haar borst op mijn borst te leggen. Het geluid en de beweging van mijn ademende borst en kloppende hart kalmeerde haar snel en binnen een paar seconden was ze buiten westen en bleef ook zo voor ongeveer een uur. Toen kwam de tijd om haar voor te bereiden op de operatie steeds dichter bij. De zusters brachten de operatie-kleding en terwijl ik mijn contact lensen inzette en de ochtend verwelkomde, maakt Rehana onze baby dochtertje klaar voor wat er zou komen. Tegen de tijd dat ik terug kwam, lag Julia in de armen van Rehana, in een schattig operatie-jurkje met kleine tekenfilm figuurtjes en bloemetjes geloof ik. We gingen naar de Operatie Kamer rond 7:00 uur ’s ochtends en rond 8:00 uur gaven we haar een kus op haar wang en wensten haar een veilige operatie. Ze opende haar oogjes kort en we probeerden onszelf gerust te stellen door onszelf te zeggen dat alles goed komt.

De volgende drie uren waren de langste uren van mijn leven en mijn zenuwen vlogen naar alle delen van mijn lichaam. Ik vond het enorm koud, mijn maag was overstuur en was enorm slaperig en het zitten in de Familie Kamer was de engste tijd van mijn leven. Elk persoon die ik zag lopen, elk inkomende telefoon gesprek (op mijn telefoon of wie dan ook in die kamer), elk piepend apparaat en elke deur die opende voorstelde doem in mijn hoofd en ik kon het niet meer aan. Gedurende een kort toilet bezoek, namen de zenuwen over en kwam alles wat ik eerder had gegeten verticaal terug naar buiten. Het kalmeerde mijn maan voor een korte tijd, maar niet voor lang. Rehana belde de Operatie Kamer, maar nog steeds geen nieuws. “Waarom? We hebben haar naar binnen gestuurd om 8:00 uur en de operatie (als alles goed zou gaan) zou niet langer dan 2 uur duren!” We hadden echter niet gerekend vanaf het juiste moment en ik realizeerde me snel dat dat de fout was: Haar operatie was geplanned voor rond half 10, wat betekende dat ze niet eerder dan half 12 uit de operatie zou komen. En het was toen nog maar 20 voor 11. Meer angsten later werd een erg welkom telefoongesprek gemaakt naar mijn mobiele telefoon: Julia’s operatie was goed verlopen. Ze waren in staat haar vernauwing te herstellen en Julia had het geweldig gedaan gedurende de gehele operatie. Ze werd op dat moment voorbereidt voor de overplaatsing naar de Peadiatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU) en zou zeer snel bezoekers mogen ontvangen.

We gingen snel naar de IC en wachtten om haar te mogen zien. Mijn schoonmoeder zag het grote bed met een kleine dame rustend in het midden en wij snelden ons via een andere ingang om een blik van ons kleine meisje te kunnen opvangen. Daar lag ze, omringd door een grote groep dokters, verpleegsters en specialisten. Het duurde nog minstens anderhalf uur voor we daadwerkelijk naar binnen mochten en ons meisje te mogen zien na de operatie. Ze ligt in een groot aquarium, omringd door grote machines die haar voorzien van medicijnen, terwijl andere machines letterlijk elke hartslag in de gaten houden. Het is het meest pijnlijke beeld dat je je voor kunt stellen, als je je baby ziet liggen, aangesloten aan apparaten groter dan haarzelf en buisjes en slangetjes in en uit haar ziet komen en gaat, waar je ook kijkt. Ja, de dokters hadden ons voorbereid op dit beeld, maar we hadden dit ondergeschat, of misschien was ik dat alleen. Ik wist wat ik zou zien, maar had op hetzelfde moment geen idee.  Het maakt niet uit hoe pijnlijk het was haar zo te zien, op hetzelfde moment was het geruststellend: Ik weet dat de dokters alles in hun kracht doen om ervoor te zorgen dat mijn dochtertje het goed maakt. De dokters legden elk buisje en slangetje uit en vertelden dat ze haar buiten westen zouden houden voor minstens nog een dag, terwijl ze wordt geassisteerd door een long-machine. Nu voelt ze tenminste geen pijn op dit moment van honger, de operatie zelf of de buisjes die in haar neus en keel zitten.

Om een lang verhaal kort te maken: Ze maakt het goed en de operatie ging erg goed. De dokters waren tevreden met de uitslag van de operatie en ook al zijn de komende twee dagen als een wandeltocht op een trapeze touw, zoals de dokters het beschreven, ze zien het “Stoelwinder gen” in haar en zeggen dat ze een vechtertje is. Ze rust nu en zal dat ook nog wel een paar dagen blijven doen. Wanneer ze klaar is om minder gemediceerd te zijn, zullen ze beginnen om wat buisjes te verwijderen. Maar dat duur nog wel een paar dagen. Opvolgend na de eerste 4 dagen in de PICU, zal ze over worden gebracht naar de kinder afdeling voor een vergelijkbare duratie, maar de dokters hopen dat ze met ons mee terug naar huis mag over een dag of 7 a 10.

Houdt de situatie hier in de gaten en we zullen proberen iedereen op de hoogte te houden van wat er allemaal gebeurd. En bid voor de gezondheid van onze dochter. We missen haar zo ontzettend veel op dit moment!

Surgery is over!

Just a quick post on the status of the heart-surgery for our baby girl, Julia. Yesterday we went to the hospital in preparation of the aortic repair surgery for Julia and were lucky to both be allowed to sleep over at the hospital last night. She did great and barely complained about having to fast for the last few hours before the surgery itself, eventhough she was noticeably upset by the extraction of blood for tests in the early evening. The had to “set lines” to be able to easily provide her with a drip, monitor her blood pressure, etc and had to test her blood to determine her blood group. Now, we as parents would take every opportunity to hold our baby close whenever she’d start crying. Doctors and nurses need to do their work and are not as easily convinced. Julia however, still tried her best: She cried like there was no tomorrow but to no avail I was standing right outside the door and my heart broke hearing her cry and me not be able to do anything for her. After about 15 minutes, which were excruciatingly hard, she came out and I held her close to me, while she still shook in despair and fear from what had just happened. Luckily, a mother’s breast is the best medicine and she felt better bit by bit throughout the evening.

Her last meal was around 2:00AM and just after 4:00AM she woke up again visibly shaken from the whole ordeal earlier that night. I tried comforting her the usual ways, but it did not work as well as I’d hoped, so decided to place her chest-down on top of my chest. The sound and motion of my breathing chest and beating heart quickly calmed her down and within a matter of seconds she was knocked out and remained so for approximately an hour. Then, time came closer for her to prepare for surgery. The nurses brought the scrubs and while I was putting back on my vision-aids and welcomed the morning, Rehana prepared our baby daughter for what was to come. By the time I returned, Julia was lying in Rehana’s arms, in cute looking scrubs with small cartoon-figures and flowers I think. We went to the Operating Theatre around 07:00AM this morning and around 08:00AM we kissed her cheek and wished her a save operation. She briefly opened her eyes and we tried comforting ourselves telling ourselves that everything will be alright.

The following three hours were the longest hours of my life and nerves were rushing to every part of my body. I felt horribly cold, had an upset stomach and felt extremely sleepy and sitting in that Family Room was the worst time of my life. Every person I saw walking, every incoming phone call, every beeping machine and every door opening spelt doom in my head and I couldnt take it anymore. During a quick toilet visit, the nerves took over and whatever I ate earlier came back out the vertical way. It relieved my stomach for a short while, but not for long. Rehana made a quick call to the Operating Theatre, but still no news. “Why? We had sent her in at 8:00AM and the surgery (if all went well) should only take 2 hours!” We however counted from the moment she went in and soon I realized that that was incorrect: Her surgery was scheduled for around 09:30AM, which meant she’d be out around 11:30AM only. And it was only 10:40AM by then. More freights, fears and anxieties later, a very welcomed phone-call on my handphone: Julia’s surgery went well. They were able to repair the narrowing of the aorta and Julia had done great throughout the entire surgery. She was being prepared for release to the Paediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU) and should be ready for visitors shortly.

We quickly made our way to the ward, and waited to see her. My mother-in-law spotted the big bed, with a tiny lady resting on top and we rushed by another entrance to catch a glimpse of our little baby girl. There she was, surrounded by a large team of surgeons, nurses and specialists. It took at least another 1 and a half hours before we could actually go inside and see our girl after her surgery. She’s in a huge fish-tank, surrounded by huge machines supplying her with mediciation, while others are monitoring literally her every heart-beat. It is the most painful sight you can imagine, when you see your baby lying attached to machines bigger than herself and tubes going in and coming out of her wherever you look. Yes, the doctors had prepared us for this sight, but we were ignorant, well at least I was. I knew what I was going to see, yet had no idea at the same time. No matter how painful it was to see her that way, at the same time it was comforting: I know the doctors are doing everything in their power to make sure she’s doing ok. The doctors explained every tube and line in and out of her and explained that she’ll be kept knocked out for at least another day, while she’s being supported by a longue-machine. At least she will experience no pain at this point from hunger, the surgical procedure or the tubes down her nose and throat.

Long story short: She’s doing good and the surgery went really well. The doctors are very pleased with the results of the surgery and although the upcoming 2 days will be a walk on a tight-rope as the doctors described it, they see the “Stoelwinder-gene” in her and said she’s a fighter. She’s resting now and will remain doing so for the days to come. When she’s ready to be less medicated, they’ll start removing some of the tubes. But that’ll be a few more days. Following these first 4 days in the PICU, she’ll probably have to go to the paediatric ward for a similar length of time, but doctors are hoping she’ll be able to leave back home with us within 7 to 10 days.

Monitor the situation here and we’ll try and keep you posted on how things come along. And pray for our daughter’s well-being. We just miss her so much right now!

Een snel berichtje

Even een snel berichtje om te kijken of de integratie met Hyves goed werkt. Via deze manier zal ik mijn best doen om wat vaker een berichtje achter te laten op Hyves, door mijn blog met Hyves en Facebook te integreren. Dus bij deze:

Alles gaat hier goed en ik ben weer druk in de weer om nieuwe fotos van ons klein wondertje te uploaden naar mijn Flickr account. Julia maakt het goed en groeit als kool Haar hartje doet het ook goed, alleen zijn de dokters toch bezorgd over de vernauwing die verder heeft plaatsgevonden in haar Aorta. Daarom willen ze haar een operatie laten ondergaan op 22 December 2008. Het wordt (of is) allemaal erg spannend en eng, maar we moeten de hoop op het positieve houden. Onze zorgen of angsten maken de operatie niet beter of slechter, dus gewoon even afwachten en kijken hoe alles verloopt. Via deze weg houdt ik iedereen op de hoogte.

Oh, en vergeet niet even een reactie, berichtje of commentaar achter te laten, want daar doe ik het voor! Zolang iedereen blijft reageren, blijf ik schrijven En hopelijk na een betere nachtrust ook wat beter en netter dan dit berichtje Dus: Tot Snel!

Changes in Progress

It’s been a long long time since I posted anything on my blog, and a recent upgrade to the latest version of WordPress, together with a clean-up in Facebook seem to be a good starting ground for me to start writing some messages on my blog again! So, here we go! I hope you’ll enjoy a few updates from me every now and then. If not, well erm… Well, let me know in that case ;P

Things are going great for us lately, we moved to our own house in May 2008 and we’re happy campers! The house is great, the facilities are excellent and we’ll only be stuck to a major loan for the upcoming 30 years!! Furthermore, we’ve received a new commitment for life: a beautiful little girl by the name of Julia was born into this world on the 19th of November 2008, one day before Rehana’s birthday. At the day of her birth, she weighed 3.285kg and measured 50cm tall. By now, she’s surpassed 3.4kg and is around 54cm and counting!

She was diagnosed with heart problems even before birth tho, and is scheduled to go into surgery on 22nd December, so another week to go. Scary as hell I can tell you and there’s not a moment in the day that I dont think about my fears to lose her so shortly after she’s made us so happy. But we cant think that way.. The doctors in this country are great and the medical care is excellent too. She’s a strong little girl and I’m sure she’ll be alright! We just have to focus on the positive and pray to God that things will turn out alright..

Anyways, I’ll try and keep everyone posted through this new way of posting to Facebook and other places and as soon as I have something useful to say, you’ll read a new message here!

Want to read more of my ramblings? Make sure to leave me a comment, email, note or message as that’ll be the drive to keep telling people about me and my life Till soon!

TV Appearance

When my wife was watching TV sometime ago, some stupid TV show on Colours and the way they describe the health of a human being. They went through all the colours, and when they came to white, she was thinking: “Oh sure, they’ll show a white guy walking by..”. And sure enough, they did.. But then suddenly she noticed: “Hey! That’s MY white guy!”.. Check it out, my debut television appearance, for a mere 3 seconds:

Before they were famous..

Just spotted this post of pictures of people from BEFORE they were famous Love those pictures.. Makes you realize that EVERY child has an opportunity to become someone and its a matter of choice to put in the effort. If you’re willing to work hard and be different, you have a chance to become somebody.. Anyways, check it out

http://eatliver.com/before-they-were-famous/index.html

In Memory of Steve Irwin

Get this video and more at MySpace.com

Rest in Peace, Dommie..

Today, my mom called me to inform me that our cat of 12 years has passed on.. A cat like no other and one that will be truly missed, had to be put to sleep because she met misfortune in the last day of her life..

When Dommie was just a few weeks old, her mother was hit by a car, while we were sitting outside, celebrating my sister’s birthday. The sound still plays in my head, as a loud bang made all of us get up and rush to the roadside. Her mother, “Anoeska” was hit by a man in a mini-van type of car. I was so pissed with him, for not paying close attention, although in actual fact, I knew it wasnt his fault. As a 16-17 year old boy, I cried over the loss of another truly remarkable cat, sweet as sugar and responsive to anyone. Little did I know that her daughter, Dommie, would bring as much joy to our lives, as she did..

Dommie was only a few weeks old, and we had to feed her by hand, trying to raise her to the strong cat that she became.. When one day, suddenly she stuck her head through one of the holes in the “banana-box” that we kept her and her little brother in. Because she had pushed her head through, probably while adventuring around the familiar area, she was unable to pull it back, as the ears blocked her return! On the outside of the box, she looked like a life hunting trophee, and it was then that we decided to call her Dommie, or “Silly” in English.

She grew up to become a strong cat, surviving many ordeals, from coming home with a bleeding face, dislocated nose and a crunching skull, likely caused by a car-accident, or someone that had kicked her in the face. We thought then that her days were counted, but no, indeed cats have nine lives: Dommie miraculously survived and became more beautiful than she was before! Just months after that, again she came home, bleeding from her near her legs. This time, it seemed like she had tried to jump over barb-wire, and got her leg stuck and tore the skin on her stomach. The vet recommended: keep her in the house for a while, but there’s little we can do.. She’ll have to heal on her own..

Dommie brought forward MANY kittens, every year, twice a year there was news of 2-4 newborns and they all found homes around the area, sometimes close, sometimes further away, but always – at the best of our knowledge – at peaceful and loving homes, where they hopefully still live today. One day however, my mother decided she had to “close the fence”, no more kittens.. So we started feeding her “the pill”. This time around however, she was not as “dumb” as her name might make her seem, as she figured that pills can be swallowed, regurgitated and thrown up on the lawn when nobody’s watching! She did this a few weeks in a row and found her Casanova in the neighbourhood.. Weeks later, again she was pregnant!

My mother got a bit worried, as she had been feeding her “the pill” continuously while paying attention she wouldn’t throw it up! And now, she was pregnant again! So, per immediate my mother stopped feeding her the pill, as this could endanger her pregnancy.. Some weeks later, she gave birth to 2 little kittens, 1 strong and 1 weak. The weak one was black with white, a beautiful, but very tiny kitten.. She was so weak that somewhere at night, a soft meow’ish squeel signaled her end.. We thought this would be the last time we’d see her kittens be born.

Yet, she still gave birth twice or three times after that. Yes, maybe we could have gotten her sterilized, yet we decided not to, or never got around to doing so.. If only we had, but that is always in hind-sight.. As today, my sister sent me a message online saying: Dommie gave birth to 4 baby kittens last night! The joyous news however ended quickly, as my mother was able to inform me that she saw Dommie jump out the window as she always did, however this time something seemed to be “hanging out of her”..

My mother tried to find Dommie outside, but she had already run off. Leaving the window open, my mother hoped to find Dommie back in the house in the morning, but she didnt. Several times my parents scoured the area, calling her name, when suddenly my dad spotted her in the bushes.. There she was, lying down, with something hanging out of her: her womb! She was rushed to the vet, but it already turned out to be too late: Dommie was uncureably ill and would not be able to pull through.. The vet advised us to let her sleep in, together with her 4 newborns..

With that, 12 magnificient years with a beautiful, loving, responsive and sweet cat by the name of Dommie left this earth and moved on.. Rest in peace, Dommie.. We will truly, TRULY miss you.. I love you..

No Lasik for me!

So, I spent a grand total of 5 hours doing all kinds of tests last Thursday, in a – failed – attempt to get consultation for Lasik surgery.. Guess that ain’t gonna happen to me any time soon.. See, Lasik surgery is a kind of surgery where they shoot frikkin’ laser beams at your 2nd and 3rd cornea, shaping it in such a way that you are miraculously able to see without the aid of spectacles or contact lenses. Me, having pretty bad eye-sight, thought that’d be a nice investment for life.. The only problem for me was: the treshold for Lasik surgery is -11.00 degrees, in terms of eye-sight grading.. For your reference, -11.00 degrees would mean you could probably see your clearly if you’d put your hand about half a meter away from your face.. I, on the other hand, have -19.00 or for the laymen: legally blind (not to be mistaken with “Legally Blonde“, a movie starring Reese Witherspoon).

So, they offered me an alternative.. I could implant a contact lense, right into my eye, behind the cornea.. Well, that sounds all cool and stuff, but it’d also increase my chances to develop a catharact (I think that’d be “staar” in Dutch). Now, I already seem to be developing a mild form of catharact in my right eye and this’d just speed things up.. Not only that, but it’d speed money out of my bank-account faster than I could spell catharact as well: SGD 4,000 – SGD 5,000 (EUR 2,500) per eye and many follow-up medical checks for a year.. Since that would be a bit too much of an investment to me, I decided to skip it for a while more.. Ofcourse, if you want to donate any amount to my PayPal account, please do not hestitate to contact me

Nevertheless, it was a good learning experience and a disappointment and we’ll be moving forward. Hopefully, the near future will bring more developments in the optical surgery department and perhaps, God-willing, I’ll be able to go for a Lasik surgery in a few years time.. Keep you posted!

Facelift in progress

With a brand new layout, customized features and still a long way to go, I’m proud to present the stepping stones for a massive upgrade to my blog at Stoelwinder.NET Here, you will be able to read (again) what keeps me occupied, entertained and distracted during my time away from work (ok ok, also during my work-time occasionally ). Anyways, please do leave me a message every now and then and keep a close eye on the developments of this website!